"Keep Calm And Listen To Death Metal" Coffee Mug
Throw on some Incantation and turn it up to 11.
Life comes at you non-stop—work is a grind, bills come in faster than you can pay them, your phone constantly buzzing with incessant demands for your attention (life was definitely simpler before that damn invention, but that’s a rant for some future product description).
When the world gets too loud, death metal drowns it out with something louder. When reality gets too chaotic, death metal makes chaos your bitch. The irony? Those grinding, bone-crushing riffs are actually your path to inner peace.
Here's the scientific fucking truth your normie coworkers will never understand: death metal isn't making you angrier. It's your sonic therapy. When researchers at the University of Queensland strapped heart monitors to metalheads and pissed them off (for science!), guess what happened? The brutal riffs didn't amplify their rage—they processed it. The crushing drums and downtuned punishment actually left them feeling more inspired than those poor bastards sitting in silence.
So grab this mug, stay as cool as a death metal cucumber, and brew something as strong as you are. When life starts throwing punches, Keep Calm and Listen to Death Metal.
Crafted to withstand violent eyebrow furrowing, brutal dishwasher cycles, and daily caffeination rituals without fading—this mug might outlast your favorite band even after they "evolve their sound into something more progressive." But if you smash it while air-drumming along to Martin Lopez, we can't help you (but we'd understand why).
• Durable Ceramic

• Highest Quality ORCA Coating®

• Lead and BPA-free material
• Dishwasher and microwave safe
• 11oz - Height: 3.70" | Diameter: 3.19"
• 15oz - Height: 4.61" | Diameter: 3.27"
Throw on some Incantation and turn it up to 11.
Life comes at you non-stop—work is a grind, bills come in faster than you can pay them, your phone constantly buzzing with incessant demands for your attention (life was definitely simpler before that damn invention, but that’s a rant for some future product description).
When the world gets too loud, death metal drowns it out with something louder. When reality gets too chaotic, death metal makes chaos your bitch. The irony? Those grinding, bone-crushing riffs are actually your path to inner peace.
Here's the scientific fucking truth your normie coworkers will never understand: death metal isn't making you angrier. It's your sonic therapy. When researchers at the University of Queensland strapped heart monitors to metalheads and pissed them off (for science!), guess what happened? The brutal riffs didn't amplify their rage—they processed it. The crushing drums and downtuned punishment actually left them feeling more inspired than those poor bastards sitting in silence.
So grab this mug, stay as cool as a death metal cucumber, and brew something as strong as you are. When life starts throwing punches, Keep Calm and Listen to Death Metal.
Crafted to withstand violent eyebrow furrowing, brutal dishwasher cycles, and daily caffeination rituals without fading—this mug might outlast your favorite band even after they "evolve their sound into something more progressive." But if you smash it while air-drumming along to Martin Lopez, we can't help you (but we'd understand why).
• Durable Ceramic

• Highest Quality ORCA Coating®

• Lead and BPA-free material
• Dishwasher and microwave safe
• 11oz - Height: 3.70" | Diameter: 3.19"
• 15oz - Height: 4.61" | Diameter: 3.27"
Throw on some Incantation and turn it up to 11.
Life comes at you non-stop—work is a grind, bills come in faster than you can pay them, your phone constantly buzzing with incessant demands for your attention (life was definitely simpler before that damn invention, but that’s a rant for some future product description).
When the world gets too loud, death metal drowns it out with something louder. When reality gets too chaotic, death metal makes chaos your bitch. The irony? Those grinding, bone-crushing riffs are actually your path to inner peace.
Here's the scientific fucking truth your normie coworkers will never understand: death metal isn't making you angrier. It's your sonic therapy. When researchers at the University of Queensland strapped heart monitors to metalheads and pissed them off (for science!), guess what happened? The brutal riffs didn't amplify their rage—they processed it. The crushing drums and downtuned punishment actually left them feeling more inspired than those poor bastards sitting in silence.
So grab this mug, stay as cool as a death metal cucumber, and brew something as strong as you are. When life starts throwing punches, Keep Calm and Listen to Death Metal.
Crafted to withstand violent eyebrow furrowing, brutal dishwasher cycles, and daily caffeination rituals without fading—this mug might outlast your favorite band even after they "evolve their sound into something more progressive." But if you smash it while air-drumming along to Martin Lopez, we can't help you (but we'd understand why).
• Durable Ceramic

• Highest Quality ORCA Coating®

• Lead and BPA-free material
• Dishwasher and microwave safe
• 11oz - Height: 3.70" | Diameter: 3.19"
• 15oz - Height: 4.61" | Diameter: 3.27"
